A FRIEND OF A FRIEND

I’ll confess: I did it. Desperate times.

Every so often, a Facebook friend shares something from another of his/her friends and, rather than scrolling on, I stop to take notice. Maybe it’s a panda making snow angels. Or it can be a one-minute video for making cinnamon apple rings. But sometimes it is the Friend of a Friend himself. A hottie who updated his profile photo. (Good choice!) On one memorable occasion, it was a shirtless artist, posing beside his latest work. I’m big on art. I had to study the shot. I still have a vague recollection of a tanned six-pack. The art? Well, uh, it was an abstract oil painting with bold use of color. Or, actually, it could have been a bronze bust of a clown. Or macaroni art…seagulls and a sun with a happy face. Oh, but that six-pack!

So there you have it. I’m a Facebook Peeping Tom. It happens. But it’s rare. I don’t have many Friends with chiseled, shirtless macaroni-art Friends.

This morning, it wasn’t a photo that caught my eye. Instead, a Friend shared a Friend’s written post: “So…, glad to have a weekend but I got dumped last night. I knew it coming it was coming [sic]. But I’m still hurting.”

Well, I’m not stupid. I’m single and I can smell opportunity. I clicked on the poor sap’s name and searched for a photo of Mr. Available. More post-dump posts. “I need to dispose of some anger…” “Fuck this…I have experienced a very painful weekend.”

Okay,…so Mr. Almost Available.

We seem to share a love of ellipses. It could be the start of something great.

I peeped on. Finally, photos. Okay,…not my type. Oh, that makes me sound shallow. Let’s just say I realized the error of my gaze.

This is what it’s come to. I’m searching for treasure in a dump-ster.